10 Years

Ten years ago today, I made the best decision of my life and stood at an altar next to a man I loved unreservedly. The day before the wedding, as we rehearsed the ceremony and I walked down the aisle on my Dad’s arm for the first time, I felt my heart racing and a small panic hit me as the meaning of the word “forever” struck me with full force. Then, I lifted my eyes and saw Zach waiting for me up ahead. Every doubt blinked away in an instant. On our wedding day, I felt nothing but absolute calm and joy. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt, as I had known for a very long time, that he was someone special. That my heart had a laid a claim to him and wouldn’t be letting go. That he and I had spirits that were intertwined.

For ten years, we have been by each other’s sides, sharing in every decision, every change, every triumph and failure. We have walked side-by-side into a life of marriage, the world of parenting, the responsibilities of adults who have mortgages and children and vehicle maintenance. It may seem mundane and ordinary, but somehow, that’s what makes it magical. The “everydayness” of it all. I am living my happily ever after. I wake up every morning, knowing he is there, as steady and loving as he was ten years ago. We fall asleep every night, committed to another day, another month, another year of doing exactly that same thing.

We have vacationed together. Lived together. Quarantined together. We’re raising children together. All these big things which can cause rifts and pull people apart, we find solidifying us together. Sure, we disagree, we argue, we yell, but it’s definitely the exception rather than the rule for us. We’re both in this for the long haul and, while we may occasionally get frustrated, neither of us ever intends to give up.

Zach, I love you for a dozen big reasons and a million small ones. The way you give and give and give to take care of me and the kids, never complaining. The way you look with our baby snuggled on your shoulder. The way you laugh at my stupid jokes, like they’re actually funny. The way you cook the most amazing meals and make me try weird new foods. The way you listen so patiently to our children. The way you are raising them to be feminists, demonstrating what that means with your own actions and words. The way you trust me to cut your hair (even before I trusted myself to do it). The way you believe in me.

Thank you for the last decade. Thank you for the life we’ve built together. Thank you for all the love. “You make my dreams come true.”

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